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20Jun

Learning To Wait

waitI hate waiting

I hate waiting on people

I hate waiting on anyone to make-up their mind

I hate the waiting time  it takes to hear the outcome of a query

I hate waiting to hear about the outcome of an interview

I hate that my heart beats in ways I cannot control when I have to wait

I hate waiting when important decisions about my life are being made by people I do not know.

I hate waiting on the doctor’s report

I hate waiting, no questions asked, no two ways about it

The experience of being a single woman best defines how I hate waiting

For it is a hard and painful process because of the lessons you learn

And though I hate waiting I have had no choice but to wait

It is unheard of that a woman married herself

And in waiting, there have been experiences

That left me bitter with a bile taste in my mouth

But I have waited because life refused to fast forward my season

In my waiting time, I have learnt to love myself

Define how I want to be treated

Expand and broaden my horizons

Come out of my comfort zone

Learn to treat others with respect

For what I give is what I get

And my reality is a reflection of my actions

Above all, waiting has been about the journey to come to a place of my own

A place where my confidence is not dependent on others

A place where I love myself regardless of a significant other

A place where I am comfortable with the men in my life as they treat me like a lady and teach me about other men

A place where a smile is just that, a smile and not a sign that he is in love with me

A place where I do not feel the need to flaunt myself or make my presence felt though I am sometimes tempted to

A place where I can confront myself, mistakes and flaws…and imperfections…

And in waiting, I have come to the conclusion…

That that which is meant for me will not pass me by

Or be as difficult as the love relationships I wanted desperately

And so, planned and plotted to make them happen

If I had to do it all over, I would wait again

No regrets, no questions asked

Just learning to wait…

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5 Responses to “Learning To Wait”

  1. Ola Awonubi says:

    Well said Belinda. I too know what it is to wait but rest assured that God is working behind the scenes to bring about his perfect plan and purpose in the lives of his children. Believe me – if its not from God. You dont want it.

  2. Belinda Otas says:

    Thanks Ola, you got that right. If it is not from God, I don’t want it.

  3. Myne Whitman says:

    I love this poem. Not only well written, but thoughtful and evocative too. Waiting may not be anyone’s first choice but sometimes, in waiting, we learn so much. Thanks for sharing Belinda.

  4. Belinda Otas says:

    Thanks Myne. Glad to hear you enjoyed it.

  5. Debrah says:

    I understand waiting is not always easy. According to CORRIE TEN BOOM “Every experience God gives us, every person He sends into our lives, is the perfect preparation for the future that only He can see”. Waiting is God’s way of preparing us. Very inspiring.

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